Dominique Gardner was seen in the Lifetime docu-series, 'Surviving R. Kelly,' being rescued by her mother.

Since breaking free of R. Kelly's control, Gardner's mother revealed that Dominique was taking time to heal and was receiving therapy for her trauma.

But Dominique has chosen to speak out in her first interview since escaping Kelly. She claims that she does not regret the nine years she spent with Kelly.

“I am not just about to spread lies about him,” she told The New Yorker—but she struggles to find a better way to describe a situation that, according to her, people don’t really understand, at least not the way she does. 

“I wouldn’t even say ‘mind games.’ It was just the fact that he tried to break me,” she said. “I couldn’t be broken. He wanted that control over me, and I wouldn’t give him that power. So, he figured, like, If I don’t give her food, she’ll come around. Nope. I’d rather die than come around and give you my soul.”

Speaking of his interview with Gayle King, she said the following:

“That’s not genuine. That’s the devil talking,” she said. “Talking about ‘I’m not Lucifer.’ Yes, you are.”

But she did also say:

“he is a giver, because when everything between me and him was good—oh, my God, it was, like, perfect. But, as soon as he gets mad, he turns into a person like, oh, what up, the new Rob.”

She claimed that there were no locks on the doors and that they could use the internet. But they were forbidden from contacting their family and had to wear baggy clothes.

“I couldn’t even have a drink without his permission,” Gardner said. “I’m a grown-ass woman, and I’ve gotta ask you if I want a drink? Everything you do, you have to ask him. That’s not living, that’s not normal. I’ve got to ask to use the f*cking bathroom? Are you serious? I’m about to pee on myself if I can’t get in contact with you. What the f*ck is this?”

She told the paper about her punishments which included spankings, slappings, beatings, and being hit with an extension cord. Throughout the entire interview, Dominique goes back and forth about her feelings on her time with Kelly and is clearly conflicted. 

Click here to read the full interview.